On Rerouting your Mind While Overcoming Addiction

 

When someone thinks of recovering from addiction, what probably comes to mind is rehabilitating physically and overcoming intense withdrawals to ultimately feel normal again. Or even taking the twelve steps to rethink and reroute life mentally and spiritually, inviting in a higher power to take the reins thrown away so long ago. While these might be true, nothing you read online or in a textbook about how addicts start recovery is as close to this: when addicts decide to recover nothing is worse than the intense desire they have to continue on the hunt for their next or last high. Imagine doing anything and thinking of nothing but your next high for months or years in end and then, finally, deciding you quit. While the want to quit is a huge motivation for many addicts, since we truly do know that we are harming ourselves and others going down a dead-end road, that urge to go after more is still there. It is the worse nagging and craving demon on your back imaginable and almost as bad as physical withdrawals. It's easy enough to say "mind over matter" or to tell an addict to give it to God, but if they do not replace this urge with a want for something better and to chase that something every moment of every day, overwhelmingly that insistent demon takes over. 

If you are overcoming addiction find or rediscover what you love and chase it. Laugh at the dragon and follow down a new path made out of love and and an unstoppable wish to create a new life out of the ashes of what came before. Find what sets your soul on fire and chase it, is my advice. 

How to Set Smart Goals

How to Set S.M.A.R.T. Goals

(And Accomplish What You Want in Life)

Chance are, you have dreams, a to-do list, and maybe even a rough list of goals. Or maybe you're a bit more organized and you have your goals divided up into days, weeks, months, and years. Even better, you've managed to cross off some of these goals because you've already accomplished them and you're heading on towards the next task at hand. If so, that's great.

But, have you ever had goals and dreams that you have written down but never ended up crossing off, even to this day? If you have problems achieving what you want to accomplish in life, learning about how to set S.M.A.R.T. goals can help you finally make your dreams and goals come true. 

What are S.M.A.R.T Goals?

Significant

Manageable

Advantageous

Rewarding

Timely

What does this mean in terms of accomplishing goals?

• Your goals should be Significant in that they will solve a problem, add substance to your life, or otherwise aid you positively in some way. 

Ask yourself questions like:

"Will this goal help me in the future?" 

"Is this goal relevant to attaining my long-term goals?"

"Is this goal something I really want or need to accomplish?"

"Will this goal be a big help to me if I complete it?"
"Is this goal going to serve a purpose that will benefit me?"

If the answers to these questions are all "yes," you have a significant goal that you should pursue. 

• Making your goals Manageable is important; Setting unrealistic, unattainable, or unhelpful goals will only serve to discourage you, waste time better spent, and distract you from what really matters.

When thinking of how to make your goals manageable, ask yourself these questions:

"Do I have the time, resources, and abilities/skills to complete this goal?"

"Is this goal realistic in regards to what I wish/need to accomplish?"

"Can I pursue this goal in addition to the rest of my tasks and responsibilities, without causing undo stress and over-burdening myself?"

If your answers are all "yes," you have a manageable goal. 

• Advantageous goals are those that will advance you, your career, your health, or anything else you with to improve in your life. These are the goals you set in order to reap results and move forward in your objectives.

To figure out if a goal you're setting is advantageous, ask yourself questions like:

"Will this help me boost my finances, sales, skills, relationships, etc.?"

"Will this have a positive impact on my life when I complete it?"

"Will this goal help to improve me and my life situation upon completion?"

If your answers are "yes," your goal with be of advantage to you.

• Rewarding goals can be like your advantageous goals, but rewarding goals are more applicable to your well-being than advantageous to your status in your career, family, and life. Rewarding goals are meant to be goals that motivate you to succeed and add essential meaning to your life. These can be goals that relate to self-improvement, relationships, health(mental, physical, and emotional), spirituality, and the like.

If you want to know if the goals you are setting are rewarding, ask questions like:

"Will completing this goal make me happier or healthier?"

"Will fulfilling this goal boost my self-esteem/confidence?"

"Will working on this goal improve my relationships with others?"

"Can this goal improve my spirituality or outlook on life?"

If you said "yes," your goals are rewarding 

• Timely goals are those that you will finish given a set deadline or self-imposed completion date. 

Ask yourself these questions if you want to know if your goals are achievable in a given time-frame:

"Can I complete this goal by [set date] or in a certain [time frame]?"

"When broken down into smaller goals to be completed in a (example: week-by-week) basis, will my larger goal be finished by the deadline?"

"Do I have enough time in my schedule to pursue this goal?"

If the answers are all "yes," then you have enough time to go after your goal(s). 

Once you set S.M.A.R.T. goals, you are on track to completing the most important objectives in your life and you will be well on your way to a better life. 

When pursuing your goals you will want to review the questions asked here and plan your schedule accordingly. Take time and your other responsibilities into consideration while you do this and you will discover that once-impossible goals are quite achievable. 

How to Procrastinate on Procrastination

How to Procrastinate on Procrastination: Reasons we Procrastinate & How to Avoid it

We all have lists of things we need or want to do and deadlines we should or would like to complete them in. How often is it that you fold that laundry after it's done instead of waiting until the dryer empties itself piece-by-piece by becoming a temporary dresser? It's a rare thing and we all know how much our lives would improve if we could just learn how to stop procrastinating.

Instead of checking off tasks from our to-do list and completing goals when we're supposed to do them, we talk ourselves out of our goals and do things we'd much rather be doing, like watching Netflix or browsing social media. But, how do we expect things to get accomplished if we're self-sabotaging ourselves before we even start? 

• The first thing we need to do is take a step back and think about why we're procrastinating in the first place. 

We know what need to do and in what time frame it would be best to complete these tasks in. Time is a huge problem because we all seem to think that we have never-ending tomorrows in which to accomplish our tasks in. I've continuously put off assignments until "tomorrow" up until the deadline and then stress out because I wasted so much time (that I could've spent creating a decent report) on activities of little to no importance to me. 

We waste so much time on tomorrows when we could just put our foot down and start today. After three weeks of adding "write in my blog" in my weekly goals, I'm finally here writing in my blog. If I had done what I wanted to every week for the past three weeks, I'd have three blog posts and no guilt over wasted time. 

Respecting ourselves and our time is a huge part of overcoming procrastination. 

Time Management is a beneficial skill to learn. Using a  calendar, planner, a spreadsheet, your phone, or sheet of paper on which you can record and keep track of your goals and tasks (with the deadlines and time periods allotted to each) is an underestimated habit and  tool for overcoming procrastination. 

If a task doesn't have a set deadline I highly recommend spacing goals out in terms of days, weeks, months, etc. Break up big goals into steps and give them deadlines too, then work your way up. Keep track of everything you want to do and work towards ticking these tasks off of the list. Make a game out of it. Reward yourself when you complete things and you'll get a lot more done. For me, just completing all of my goals for a given day is satisfaction enough, but if you need to bribe yourself then do it.

Sometimes you have to just make yourself do things. If you're like me, you're often plagued with nagging thoughts of all of the things you should or want to do, but you just don't seem to want to do it. It can always be done later, right? 
It is so easy to fall into the trap of letting tasks and goals slide until a later time, but why not just do what you need to when you think of doing it? Just think about how great you'll feel by accomplishing your tasks as you think of them, rather than spending all day musing on how great it would be to do this or that in the near future. If you get that load of laundry done or write that report now you're free to spend the rest of your day doing other tasks or pursuits that you want to do.

• Fear of Failure. Have you ever ever had a project that seemed so impossible that you didn't know where to start or how you would complete it on time? Have you been so scared you wouldn't do things right or that you will be unsuccessful in your pursuits?

If you have the mindset that your endeavors are likely to fail or that they are too difficult to complete, procrastination can be the result. Putting your projects off until a later date and telling yourself that you will figure them out then is likely to happen unless you focus and cut these big projects down into more manageable pieces. 

Would you rather write a whole essay in one evening, right before the day it's due? Or does it sound easier to spread the paper out for the two weeks you're given, working on a thesis one day, an outline the next, and then a beginning, a middle, and an ending until you have a well-written and thought out composition? Breaking down intimidating undertakings into small goals to complete over time is a lot easier than facing a monster of a goal in one undertaking. 

• As odd is it may seem, the fear of success can impede progress and cause procrastination. By accomplishing more, often more is expected and this can be a roadblock to progress for some.

Don't be afraid to succeed because you will inevitably have more expected of you. As you achieve your goals and jump hurdles in life, you build resilience and can take on even more than you ever thought possible. It is a freeing thing to encounter obstacles in life and fulfill them; you will open doors to new possibilities and discover in yourself a determination to do even more. 

• Motivation is a drive that is ever so fleeting and there are hundreds to thousands of quotes and articles out there about how to find and maintain it. Sometimes we find ourselves without the drive to complete our obligations and nothing we tell ourselves seems to kick-start our ambition. 

I've found that reflecting on why I'm doing the task at hand is a huge motivation for me. Think about how you feel when you get that essay done or finally complete that chore and you might just find your ambition to start & complete it. 

Listening to music that gets you inspired and pumped up is a great way to build up the enthusiasm to take on your to-do list. Put on music that invigorates you and start tackling your calendar. You'll find that you can have fun while you're doing things you otherwise don't feel like doing.

Recite affirmations and read quotes to lift your motivation. While it might not seem like much, just repeating a mantra to yourself can go a long way in attaining and retaining inspiration. 

• Disinterest is often a reason for procrastination; If you don't have an interest in something or if it bores you, you will most likely put it off for as long as possible. 

A way to overcome this is to get this task done first. If it is something you find especially lackluster, listen to music while you do it or think of a reward to give yourself after you tackle it. Practice a little bribery on yourself. This can turn a boring assignment into something that you want to complete in order to claim a nice little bonus. 

• Lack of knowledge, skills, or materials. If you find that the cause of your procrastination is due to lack of skills or materials to pull it off, work on building up the knowledge you need in order to set into motion what you're doing. 

Read books, listen to podcasts, watch video tutorials, or take formal classes in whatever it is you need to gain competence in and then tackle your dreams & goals. 

If you lack the materials, remember that when there is a will there is a way. See if you can borrow whatever it is that you need or buy from second-hand stores. What you need will come to you and allow you to undertake anything you desire. 

• Excuse-making hinders productivity and and gives rise to procrastination. How many times have you told yourself that you're too tired, too this, or too that?

If you want to accomplish your dreams in goals in life then there are no excuses you can make to justify procrastinating on what you need to do in order to aspire. Replace your excuses with "I cans" and "I wills" and tackle your ambitions. 

If you are a victim of procrastination and you want to live a new a productive life free of "laters" and "tomorrows", it all starts with you. Find the reason behind your procrastination and resolve to conquer it. 

"You can have results or excuses, not both."-Unknown

Procrastinate on procrastination. I believe in you: If I can do it, so can you!

27 Lessons in 27 Years

27 Lessons From 27 Years of Life
(That I Wish Someone Had Told Me)

1. You are your own hero. 
   You are the only person in your life that can save you. You have to be the one that pulls yourself up by your shoelaces and carries on when you'd rather give up, because no one else is going to be there for you like you will. As much as you want someone to pick you up and fix everything for you, the only person that can truly make that difference in your life is yourself. 
2. Don't start "someday", start today. Is there a new hobby you would like to try, a language to learn, or a marathon you'd love to run? Do you have a long list of goals that you keep telling yourself that you will "someday" do? Start today. If you want to run a marathon or learn a new language, take those first steps and learn those first words today. Tomorrow, add on to what you started with today and continue with those small steps everyday. Looking back a year from now (someday) you will be happy you started today.
3. Excuses turn into regrets. 
   Making an excuse not to do something will lead to a whole list of excuses; that will lead to a whole path lined with what you should and could have done but didn't do. Don't make excuses and miss out on opportunities that may never come again. Take a deep breath, face your challenges, and do what you need to do in order to ensure your dreams become a reality. Taking uncomfortable chances feels a lot better than making excuses that lead to regret and thoughts on what "could have been" and "should have been."
4. No one cares: stop worrying so much about what people think. People are too busy to notice your bad hair day or that you're five minutes late. No one is watching you or laughing at you because they are too obsessed with thinking and worrying about themselves and what others think about them.
5. People do care.
   Contrary to what I just said, there are people out there that do care about you and support you. Whether it be your significant other, your mother, other family members, a random coworker, or an acquaintance online, there are people out there that care about how you're feeling or whether you've had enough to eat. No matter how alone you may feel I can guarantee that there is someone on this planet that holds you in a piece of their heart. 
6. Trust your gut. If you're walking down the street and you getting this nagging feeling in your gut that you shouldn't walk any farther, listen to it. Listen to this feeling about new people you meet, about opportunities that come up, and about anything else that randomly badgers your attention. Every time I've ignored this feeling, something bad has happened. Just listen and trust your intuition because this reptilian function of your body is there to keep you safe.
7. Learn all you can about budgeting and finances. 
   Money is a subject that should be taught in all schools. We all have to work with it and knowing how to budget and use money properly is paramount to living a good life. 
8. Eat/drink/exercise properly. You only have one body and you should be treating it like your most prized possession-because it is! Like money, health is an important subject that you should spend time learning about and improving in your life. 
9. Learn!
   
   "I'm still learning," Michelangelo is quoted as saying at the age of 87. Life is a journey and no one ever finishes knowing everything. But, wouldn't it be great to learn as much as you can in this life and cross the finish line full of the knowledge you accumulated across a lifetime? Never stop on the quest for understanding. If there is a subject you've always wanted to know more about, go check out a book or download an audiobook and have at it. I promise that you won't regret it.
10. Try new things. Have you always wanted to try your hand at painting? Photography? Go grab a paint brush or camera and get started. If you feel like you need more formal instruction before you go about it, see about free or discounted classes online or at your local college. I've met many people that want to try new things and they just keep putting it off until a later date. That date will never come, so if you have always wanted to do something, start (or plan to start) now. 
11. Listen to your seniors. (Or those that or older and wiser than you are.) Your parents and grandparents aren't just telling you things to frustrate you or to trivialize your life experiences. They are giving you advice to keep you from learning things the hard way-they are trying to help you and prevent you from making mistakes they may have made before. Even if you don't use their advice it is a good idea to consider it. I could have been spared so much "heartache" if I'd listened to my parents more often. 
12. Don't postpone your goals, needs, and dreams for someone else's. Don't spend your time helping everyone else to the point where you're putting everything that you want to do on hold. Time is something you'll never get back and while helping other people is great, you need to spend your time making sure what you need in life is taken care of. You can't fill others' cups from an empty glass-so make sure to keep yours full! 
13. Learn to say no. This ties in with the last one.  While it is a good thing to give and help others out, don't do so to the point where you're filling others' glasses with what's left in your cup. You need to take care of yourself first before you can take care of others. 
14. Do something everyday that leads you toward the future that you want, no matter how small.
    
    Invest fifteen minutes a day doing or learning something that will benefit you. It doesn't seem like much but all of that time adds up and you will soon be a master at that skill or in that new language. 
15. Conquer your fears & doubts and you are halfway there.
    "Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will," Suzy Kassem. Don't let your fears or doubts talk you out of things before you even begin. Remember the times where you were scared to accomplish something but did it anyway (chances are it wasn't so bad or scary as you thought and chances are everything else you're afraid of won't be so bad either.) Don't let the fear of failure stop you before you even begin. 
16. Learn a new language/about a new culture. The world is a big and beautiful place; there are so many different and unique peoples and cultures on this planet that enrich this earth. Exploring different cultures and languages other than your own serves to widen your perspective and color your life in ways that nothing else can. So learn that new language and while you're at it, learn about the history and customs of the people who speak it. 
17. Get to know as many people as you can. I can't underestimate the importance of building new relationships and expanding your connections. That person you meet at the coffee shop could be someone that helps you with a job reference. That mechanic you build a repertoire with might be your go-to and may give you deals every time you have car troubles in the future.  Everybody has value and acquainting yourself with a wide variety of people only serves to help you and them. 
18. Do something every day-or week-that carries you outside of your comfort zone.
    Chances are that if you're scared of something it will teach you or otherwise enhance your life. As cliche as this is, do things that are out of your comfort zone every once in a while. This will cause your comfort zone to expand and give you the courage to try more new and exciting things. Eventually you'll be doing things you never dreamed you could or would be doing. 
19. Allow yourself to dream big.
    
    No one ever accomplished huge dreams by dreaming small. We didn't get to the moon by being comfortable remaining on earth. Big dreams equal big achievements. You have to put in the work and plans to accomplish these dreams, but accomplishment started with someone thinking "what if?"
20. Find a healthy way to cope with stress. Practice meditation, do breathing exercises, or go on daily runs/walks. Participate in activities that make you happy and find hobbies that bring you joy. Finding ways to deal with stress in a positive manner can prevent burnout, substance dependency, further stress, and so much more. 
21. Honesty really is the best policy. Tell the truth. You won't have to remember lie upon lie if you tell the truth the first time. Life is easier this way and people will appreciate and respect you for it.
22. Don't be afraid to make mistakes or fail.
    No one is perfect and everyone makes mistakes. Mistakes and failures ultimately help you to learn; you figure out what you did wrong and work on ways to do things right the next time around.  Thomas Edison is quoted as saying "I haven't failed-I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." Edison didn't let his failures stop him, he learned from them and ultimately invented the light bulb. 
23. If you want something bad enough, you will find ways to get or accomplish it. "When there is a will, there is a way. If there is a chance in a million that you can do something, anything, to keep what you want from ending, do it." (Kael, Pauline) If you have been spending years thinking of getting a degree or pursuing a new job, now is the time. Take the steps and plan to get what you want with unwavering determination and persevere to attain it. It will ultimately be yours. 
24. If something is meant to be yours it will be.
    Sometimes you don't get what you want, no matter how hard you try. If you've done all you could to make something come true and it isn't enough, then maybe it wasn't meant to be yours at this moment in time. This doesn't mean that you can't try again later. At times we all have to cut our losses and move on to what is meant for us. Losing what we think we want often opens way for new and better things we never knew we wanted. 
25. Let it go. Worries, grudges, anger, and the like will eat you alive if you let them. If you can't do anything right now to fix a problem and the worry is burning at you, remind yourself that right now it is out of your hands. Let it go. Holding on to grudges and anger is like drinking poison and expecting it to harm your enemies. You're only hurting yourself, so it is best to come to terms with the emotions and release them. You will be a lot happier and less stressed out if you free yourself from these negative emotions after you've allowed yourself a healthy amount of time to feel them. 
26. You can't change anyone but yourself. As much as you'd love to change some people around you, you can't. Instead, focus on what bothers you about them and see if these qualities reflect in yourself. If you find that you are projecting you can always change your ways and be better able to deal with the person that is bothering you. If anything you will have improved yourself and this negative trait probably won't irritate you anymore, as you will understand and relate to where this person is coming from better. If you can't see in yourself what is bothering you in a person, just focus on being a better person yourself. You can't change other people, but by changing yourself you can change how you react and relate to them. 
27. Always work on bettering yourself. You are never too old to improve yourself. If you are thirty years old and want to get in shape and train in order to run a marathon, by all means, do so. If you are forty-five, stuck in a dead-end job and want to go back to school in order to gain a better skill-set and start a new career, it is never too late. Always work on improving yourself. There is no deadline on making yourself a better person and enhancing your life.